My family and the trials of being one of them...

I don't know why but my entire life I have felt that I didn't belong to the family I was born into. I feel out of place with them, around them and whenever I say anything to them. They don't know me very well and don't seem to care to. I am by far the closest to my Dad. He's the special one to me and always has been. I guess perhaps it's because I'm alot like him. His temper, his way of doing things. But even he has moments when he looks at me and I can see he's wondering how I ended up being who I am. I know I'm a disappointment to them - they've told me this in exact terms. Now I've reached a point in my life where being a disappointment to them, doesn't bother me half as much for reasons, but those same reasons increase my concern because my baby girl is about to come into this world and I don't want her to ever feel I am not good enough, or lacking in some way because I don't agree with their views. In fact it will make me quite savage should someone put those thoughts into her little head.

I will not allow my baby to be taken to church every Sunday, I have long ago turned my back on the church, it did nothing for me except betray me and while I have no active commission against their beliefs or their places of worship, I want her to be old enough to make her own decisions. Should she come to me and tell me she would like to go to church, then I will take her myself and pick her up myself. I do not believe in censoring children, I believe she should be free to grow and mature and decide for herself.

I guess this is all coming up because my mothers sister is up from Boston. Too many family members and not enough of MY kind of people.

Anyway - the cops have Leah again so I must go and see what the drama is. I'll post more when I know it.

Ter

PS. Did I mention I wanted to move to Alberta??